Everyone has some kind of fear in life. For example, the fear of heights, the fear of dogs, the fear of strangers and the fear of Mathematics. Some have the fear of snake as well. I also had a fear, the fear of English. Mostly while speaking and delivering speeches in public especially in front of those who spoke fluently.
When I was in school, the English subject was not given much importance. It was a Hindi medium school. We had the choice to opt for English medium for some subjects even if we were taught in Hindi. I had chosen to study Science and Maths in English. Everything was going good. I was proud of myself since I was far better than most of the students in this language.
Soon, I moved to good college in Patna and found that many of the students were speaking English fluently as if they are born and brought up in English speaking surroundings. They were convent educated students and from that day I realised my hold on English was not good. I started stammering in front of those students. Even if I could speak a few sentences easily, I couldn’t in front of them... a kind of inferiority complex developed in me and induced the fear of English. Every day I questioned GOD as to why I was not convent educated, I could have been so much better. I could have been more confident in front of everyone. I tried to improve this English Language... remembered words from some English vocabulary books but didn’t find proper and methodical approach to learn. I read Magazines in English, It helped but it was not up to the mark. I needed to step up my game.
Time passed and I joined in good company and found all my colleagues were very articulate. They had a hold on this language. Literally I had cried because of my shortcoming in English speaking...
Again I tried and improved some more and was able to communicate at my work place... but I failed in Public Speaking. Hesitation to speak in front of others didn’t disappear… It was painful for me.
Meanwhile I read a book Alchemist in which it was written “when you desire something, the entire universe conspires in helping you to achieve it”. I gave it some thought... I made my fear into my desire. My fear of speaking English transformed to my desire of speaking English fluently with anyone... soon my state of Mind changed and I chased my desire. It was my dream and my desire. Soon I found an advertisement of Englishmate in a newspaper and I guessed the Universe was conspiring to help me get my desire. My kids joined Englishmate during their summer holidays. After a few days I joined Englishmate for myself.
Gradually I started improving in communicative English. My course is not fully covered yet...but I am able to speak in front of anyone.. I feel more confident. The faculty is really good at it. By the time, it gets over, I will be more confident. I believe we can overcome our fear with practice, patience, perseverance.
I am still on the way to conquer my fear... I am still on verge of fulfilling my desire...
And it is rightly said ‘Find out what you are afraid of and go live there.’
Lastly I have to quote “Fear doesn.t exist anywhere except in the mind.”
This article has been written by Priyanka Kumari a student at Englishmate, a Hindustan Times venture. Englishmate helps learners to improve their communication skills by providing Cambridge certified English speaking courses.